5 Steps to Forgiveness by Margy Clair talks about not
only how to forgive, but why. The print is tiny, so you might want to dial it
up a couple of notches on your Kindle. Margy talks about how to find a good fit
if you want to go with a therapist or coach as well, though personally I keep
to my private network of friends both close and far to guide me and help me see
what I’m missing. But if you prefer the objectivity of someone who doesn’t know
you, then the first part of this book will be invaluable to you as Margy goes
through various questions to ask the therapist/life coach that you are thinking
about using.
5 Steps to Forgiveness
starts with what should be the
most obvious step as number one: acknowledge what happened. This is where a lot
of my friends and I stumble, because we just do not want to see or face what
happened and would rather pretend it didn’t happen. The next step is to feel
what happened. Yikes. This is one of the steps a counselor or therapist would
probably be the most helpful, especially if you have gone through something
really traumatic, like childhood abuse or rape. Included in this section are
two lists of feeling words, both the “good” side and the “bad” side, which can
be useful to identify what on earth that feeling is. The next step is taking
responsibility for any part you might have played, excluding children and I say
victims of rape. In my experience this is usually the easiest part, but useless
without the rest. Who hasn’t gone “yeah, I probably shouldn’t have done that”
in the past? I know I have!
starts with what should be the
most obvious step as number one: acknowledge what happened. This is where a lot
of my friends and I stumble, because we just do not want to see or face what
happened and would rather pretend it didn’t happen. The next step is to feel
what happened. Yikes. This is one of the steps a counselor or therapist would
probably be the most helpful, especially if you have gone through something
really traumatic, like childhood abuse or rape. Included in this section are
two lists of feeling words, both the “good” side and the “bad” side, which can
be useful to identify what on earth that feeling is. The next step is taking
responsibility for any part you might have played, excluding children and I say
victims of rape. In my experience this is usually the easiest part, but useless
without the rest. Who hasn’t gone “yeah, I probably shouldn’t have done that”
in the past? I know I have!
The next step is asking for help in letting go. This can be
done by your own personal beliefs to a higher power or just someone you trust.
The last step, but certainly not least, is the willingness to let go of the
person from your mental and emotional hold. 5 Steps to Forgiveness
doesn’t stop there, however, it also goes into old childhood wounds, aka “I’m
not going to be like my mother/father”. It also goes into forgiving friends as
well as forgiving in marriage and long term relationships. There is also the
forgiveness of self, which I find too often is ignored. There are many stories
in these chapters to show how things can suddenly degrade, even if you feel
you’ve done everything right. There are prayers/affirmations to help you on
your journey, as well as continual care and forgiveness.
doesn’t stop there, however, it also goes into old childhood wounds, aka “I’m
not going to be like my mother/father”. It also goes into forgiving friends as
well as forgiving in marriage and long term relationships. There is also the
forgiveness of self, which I find too often is ignored. There are many stories
in these chapters to show how things can suddenly degrade, even if you feel
you’ve done everything right. There are prayers/affirmations to help you on
your journey, as well as continual care and forgiveness.
I give 5 Steps to Forgiveness
four out of five stars.
This is definitely a book you’ll want to keep handy.
four out of five stars.
This is definitely a book you’ll want to keep handy.
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